Good Times

A Saturday Story

The other day, we got a big shipment of shelving for new trucks. No room in the warehouse, of course, so we had to get creative. My warehouse guy Nate and I found a spot, and soon enough, we were tossing boxes up once the stack got too high. My first toss? Nailed it. Perfectly aligned. Nate seemed dubious about his box-tossing skills, so I gave him a lesson in the fine art—“mastered this as a teen at TG&Y,” I explained.

After clarifying that I was a stocker, not a stalker, I launched into my TG&Y story. See, in the back stockroom, we had this loft area over the offices reserved for cases of paper goods—paper towels, napkins, and cases of hefty toilet paper. Getting those heavy boxes up there was a rite of passage. The rail had a gap in it where we could toss boxes up to someone stationed on the loft, or down to a guy on the ground. Toilet paper cases were no joke, so catching them took real grit and a bit of nerve.

One of my favorite stunts was teaching rookies to catch paper goods. For a bit of fun, I’d start them off light before tossing down something heavy. With one poor guy, I prepped him for a massive “delivery,” hyping up this huge box. After much dramatic grunting and groaning, I slid a massive case of cotton balls his way, the label strategically out of his view. He braced himself with a shriek, hands up to block it like he was fending off a charging bull. The cotton balls bounced off him like a marshmallow. I laughed. He did too, eventually.

Good times. Makes me want to prank someone today.